Sick To Death

For the last four days I’ve been teetering near the brink of death. Well, maybe not death exactly, but there have certainly been times when I would have preferred to be dead.

I must have caught a nasty bug somewhere, because Wednesday morning I woke up feeling more stupid than usual: I actually went into the bathroom to collect my watch twice, both times I found myself back outside the bathroom without my watch and with no recollection of what had just happened. Although I went to work Wednesday morning, I couldn’t stay. No more than an hour after arriving I started to shiver and my joints started aching. Except for the hour or so around 1PM when our fire alarm went off and I had to stand outside in the cold drizzle, I spent the remainder of the day asleep.

Thursday is basically a blur. I got up and tried to do some work, because I’ve set aside Thursdays as “work from home” day (in honour of the rising price of gasoline and the fact that my office is too distracting to accommodate actual work). But that didn’t last long. By noon, I was back in bed trying to sleep off nausea and ache-y joints.

Yesterday (Friday) wasn’t much better. Although the nausea was much reduced and the aching joints had all but gone away, I “enjoyed” a strange sensation in my intestines. It felt as if I’d swallowed some sort of aquatic creature which was now living in my guts. I’ll leave the various sounds to your imagination.

And now, Saturday, the aquatic creature seems to have left me – but not the urge to know where the nearest toilet is. I still have a headache, but that might be because I didn’t have any caffeine on Friday.

Maybe I’ll be functional again just in time to go back to work on Monday.