Statistically likely to be better than a roomful of monkeys*


Any suggestions on how to host a password protected podcast on Amazon S3?

I skip podcast adverts if they’re not read by the hosts.

I’m sick to death of politicians decrying other politicians for “playing politics”. Of course they are; that’s their fucking job. Stop your whining and out play them you malformed mollusc.

How can CNN’s mobile video streaming be so bad? This is literally their reason for existence and yet videos on their web site buffer endlessly, drop audio, and invert to a weird green colour all the time.

When working on a side project over the holidays I get to take advantage of all the lessons learnt while building our real App, but for which there’s never time.

Naturally, I did the refactoring any way. It makes the code cleaner and easier to understand. So when I’m finally hit by a bus and someone new is hired to take over the code, she’ll be less inclined to ask, “What the hell was he thinking?”

Using UI Tests to develop new functionality for our App seems so obvious now. I thought I’d need to do a lot of refactoring to make the App testable, but it turns out using an embedded web server in the test bundle was the right answer.

Three years ago we were in a “castle” outside Edinburgh.

‘Tis the season for pissing down rain.

Can I go back to the sunshine of Italy now?

It should be against the law to send an out-of-office auto reply unless you are a recipient in the to field. If you’re not even in the cc field the punishment should be death.

Bernie Sanders should step aside and not run for President in 2020. We have strong, vibrant, progressive candidates he should support instead.

Commuting by ferry has its compensations.

Once you design your app to use NSOperations you never want to use anything else.

Finished half of the refactoring at 01:40 this morning. Getting ready to start on the good stuff now.

Giving up my weekend to refactor the shit out of some code, because that’s the only way it’ll get done.

Although they’re just digital people it makes a difference to me when a game allows me to knock out or sedate opponents.

I feel like I need a month on a warm beach.

I’ve been reading a lot about CloudKit and watching all the WWDC videos. That’s some good stuff.

It never fails: normally I sleep fine up until my alarm, but when I actually have somewhere to be I can never sleep. It doesn’t matter when the alarm is set for I’ll wake up a half dozen times before the alarm goes off.

Someone help me: I’m actually thinking of writing an app in my personal time. Clearly I’m broken.

Today my role is to be the Rubber Duck.

Molly and I really enjoyed The House with a Clock in Its Walls. She was surprisingly frightened during a number of scenes. I’d say they did a good job for the target market.

Sometimes I stare at my code and wonder, “Wouldn’t it be lovely to just burn it all down and start fresh?” The feeling usually passes after a moment, but damn it’s tempting.

Remember to wave when almost hitting pedestrians, because that makes it all okay.

Today I’m thinking about how I can blend State Machines and Operation Queues. It’s going to be a tough day.

They’re playing Tom Petty in the gym locker room and now I want to amputate my ears.

It’s literally been months since I’ve vaccumed the house (I was away the entire month of August). Wish me luck.

If it weren’t for my helpers there’s no way I’d get the house clean today.

My collection of pain killers from around Europe has grown. Now featuring Ibuprofen from Italy. I like that the pharmacy offered Vitamin I in 500mg tablets.

It’s another weekend of cleaning. Fortunately I’ll have lots of help.

One of the best lifestyle improvements is cellular tethering and getting someone else to pay your phone bill.

I really like the Personal Capital iOS App. I just wish it wasn’t so needy. Lately it’s been practically begging me to link my mortgage and more. Dude, I just wanna track my stocks! Leave me alone.

This is why I bought two love seats.

Pretty soon the only accounts left on Twitter will belong to #brands, bigots, and Nazis.

I took some photos on our trip. You’ll enjoy them more if you read the comments.

One of the most difficult adjustments of returning from an extended holiday is having to do dishes.

If there was ever any doubt Medium was a terrible place to publish content, Medium’s decision to end support for custom domains is good evidence. Don’t be fooled by this from the help article:

If you already have a custom domain on Medium, nothing will change for you for the foreseeable future

If you have a custom domain on Medium, you better find an alternative now. The clock is ticking.

After climbing to the top of the Florence Cathedral, Molly discovered there’s no slide to get back to the bottom. Her scream was enough to wake the dead.

Normally you might not worry about updating the city transit App for a city in another country on another continent, but Berlin is starting to feel like a home away from home. Now, if only locals would let me use my German…

Earlier I mentioned all App developers should ensure their apps work well on Edge connections as well as LTE. It seems testing on flaky 3G connections is also important.

Molly and I went to Pizza Napoli 1955 for dinner tonight and I ordered the prosciutto pizza, which was delicious. I’d like to point out, however, that while this pizza has ham it does not have pineapple, because that would be an offence against nature.

Every App developer should ensure their network protocol works with slow connections. It used to be a no brainer to ensure Apps worked on Edge as well as WiFi, but so many of my favourite Apps seem too chatty or unforgiving for an Edge connection. Good thing there’s Safari.

The marina at Riomaggiore is tiny, but absolutely lovely.

I encountered this lovely kitty waiting for its lunch while I walked down to the marina at Riomaggiore.

Watching a couple take selfie after selfie in front of the Basilica of Santa Maria Novella. It was cute at first, but now it’s getting weird.

Beware: The Gucci store in Florence turns unattended children into creepy mannequins.

I tried to interest Molly in reading a nice book about a kitty lost in the Cotswolds that finds a home in a cafè, but as there were no dead bodies or mysteries, she wasn’t moved.

The cats of Venice are very well dressed. I feel crude and improper for being so underdressed, but then it’s never a good idea to compete with a cat.

Will the Venice water bus get us to the tour on time or will it all end in tears?

I feel for people trying to navigate Venice with a paper map.

Has anyone figured out the deal with Twitter’s hidden tweets? I’ve deleted everything, but still seem to have 147 tweets. Vexing.

Molly continues her goal of ridding the world of schnitzel one plate at a time.

Lifting the toilet seat seems to be for some men a struggle for which they are not mentally equipped.

Derek Powazek writes Your Community is not a Government — a great article getting to the root of what’s ailing both Facebook and Twitter. If they don’t start caring for their community, they may not have one any more.

I have given in to My Favourite Person’s demand for sushi.

Travelling with Molly is both a joy and my penance for everything bad I’ve done in my lifetime.

Having a display with the next train station is an accessibility feature not a luxury. Even when trains announce the next stop in English I have a hard time understanding them due to hearing loss and (frankly) garbage PA systems.

I don’t think I’m really the sort of person who carry’s all his stuff in a backpack frankly. Kind of a shame really as I admire that style of travel.

“Map schmap! Who do you think I am? Dora the Explorer?”

Madeline was born sometime this month 17 years ago. She’s been a great friend all this time, even if she does enjoy singing opera at 4:45 in the morning.

Microsoft’s Sway app looks pretty cool, but there’s no way I’m going to create an account or give them my email address for something like that. I’ve got too many accounts already.

The Micropub Heroku app has settings for "syndication". I wonder whether setting these will help get the new posts to show up in the timeline.

I’m still trying to get Micropub publishing working, but my site was built via Bitrise and all went well.

After threatening to shoot Robert Mueller how is it that Alex Jones is not in jail? Surely, if you or I had made a similar threat, we’d be behind bars already. YouTube has banned him. Facebook has now banned him. Of course, he’s still welcome on Twitter, which has no rules as long as you’re “newsworthy” or your followers bring in lots of ad revenue.

If it turns out there are any kids missing from the Trump Child Concentration Camps I bet Betsy DeVos ate them.

Maybe it’s just me, but do you really need to send an out of office notification when you’re just CCed on an email?

One of the great things about working in a large company is there are other teams around you doing fantastic work that makes your life easier. Everything is swell as long as your goals and their goals align. If not, you might find no matter which way you turn you’re not going to make any progress.

Fortunately, there are EPMs for times like these.

As I get ready for the day Twitter pulls the plug on third party clients, I’ve been thinking about my plan. In the past, I’ve used Twitter as a chat platform to keep in touch with friends. Before @jack burns down Twitter, I’ll want to set up iMessage chats with as many of them as possible.

I’ve already disabled receiving messages from people I don’t follow. Soon, I’ll unfollow everyone. Then noone will be able to message me.

Having a content blocker for my phone is a wonderful thing, but I only just discovered it was also blocking the contact information on my Web site. It seems anything marked with a class like social-* was getting hidden. Oops.

On 16 Aug, @jack and the policy makers at Twitter have decided to kill off support for the same third party clients that made their platform a success. The only time I used the “native” Twitter client was long before Twitter bought it and there’s no way I’m going to subject myself to an algorithmic timeline where @jack gets to decide what’s most important for me to read. If I wanted that, I’d have a Facebook account.

You may note, I’ve deleted Twitter as a contact method from my site. From now on, please use email or iMessage to get in touch.